Another Autobiography Literally NO one is Interested in.

from guardianuk

A new autobiography is about to hit the shelves, but if you were told it was by someone called Taboo, would that mean anything to you? Here are a few clues.

It starts with a quote from Thoreau about dreams, moves on to a preface about the author hitting “rock bottom” in jail and then treats us to a series of badly told stories about the author’s life, including an episode where our hero wakes up from a drug-induced stupor to hear people laughing at him.

“What are they saying about me?” he asks himself. Perhaps it was something like: “Who the hell are you?” Because despite “record-breaking success – including six Grammy Awards and 30 million albums sold”, you’d be hard-pressed to recognise this artist from a line-up.More help? It’s one of Black Eyed Peas. The one with long hair. “Of course!” none of you are saying.

It’s strange that Taboo has got his own book. He is the equivalent of Jason Orange/the two guys from East 17 at the back singing “Ooh”, ie not someone anyone is interested in. His tome is bound to join the non-bestselling likes of Bill Oddie’s One Flew Into The Cuckoo’s Egg (4,811 copies sold) and Trisha Goddard’s Trisha, As I Am (3,538 copies sold).

We can’t wait for the other anonymous BEP member – apl.de.ap’s (inevitable) tell-all.

About kara

We know our letters just fine, and we know our numbers to a certain point, but books were always the realm of four-eyed poindexters with bowler hats and cravats. That’s why it pleases us so that America’s proud illiterates are finally stepping up and pushing back against the crushing tide of education that threatens to swallow us all into its gaping maw of checked facts. Champions of the Ignorantiat will not like it here.
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