WTF is up with this country? I mean really, WHAT THE FUCK IN WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY? Over in Nebraska, they voted to increase the minimum wage while we elected the usual slate of Republicants. Nebraskans are so worried about Ebola apparently, that we’ve decided to give their kids a governor named Rickets. Is it same impulse that causes them to pay $69.95 to see “Monster Truckalopalypse!!!” They just wanna see shit blow up? Over in the Colorado senate race, the good people defeated a personhood begins at conception amendment for the umpteenth time by a far larger margin than the Republican won the Senate who VOTED for the goddamn conception thing. It’s like voters are just not paying attention or brain dead or stupid or infantile or all of them, Katie. Gardner apparently utilized the black knight strategy out of the Holy Grail to win- no it’s not! Twas a flesh wound! Colorado, Colorado…you just made the party that an asshole family er, ex-family member of mine is practically the boss of the majority. Do you realize what you’ve done to yourselves?

Well all that’s been in the news regarding popular opinion — and it’s not just from the FOX News screech machine — is that people disapprove of the economy, Obama’s foreign policy is rudderless, there’s no leadership, blah blah blah. Honestly the Democrats could’ve done a lot more to counter that criticism and highlight all that’s gone right the last six years. Obama is a fckng excellent president.

Even given that the demographics of midterm elections skew Republican, it shouldn’t have been this bad. Oh, and Debbie Wasserman-Schultz — she’s got to bear a load of responsibility for this too. Where was the DNC? What was the message? It seemed like every Democrat was fending for him or herself. GAWD, I could do that job SO WELL.

The entire country is fucking gerry-rigged and gerry-mandered we ain’t gotta prayer and money has finally saturated the country to the extent that there is no going back to normal from this point. Don’t think of it as Republicans winning. This is the People’s triumph. If by the People you mean corporations.

Americans know they’re going to fuck up, and fuck up horribly — why keep letting Lucy hold that goddamn football?

The gravestone of George Spencer Millet, erected in the Woodlawn Cemetery in the Bronx, a sad monument to a bizarre death, with a story so strange that it needed to be carved in stone for posterity.

The discreet-looking block of granite is almost invisible, lost in the vast necropolis. Like many other tombstones, it is etched with the name of the deceased as well as the parents. “Georges Spencer Millet — Son of Cornelius J. and Carrie L. Millet.” But unlike any other gravestone, the front-facing side is also marked with this strange epitaph:

“Lost life by stab in falling on ink eraser, evading six young women trying to give him birthday kisses in office Metropolitan Life Building”

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The author (left) in a bad boy’s haircut and little brother

The ritual is familiar to almost anyone who grew up in America in the late twentieth century. Halloween has become perhaps the most “universal” American holiday. It proposes no ethnic identity, no national allegiance, no specific religious affiliations. You don a costume and walk around your neighborhood asking for candy. Growing up in Philadelphia, Halloween was a very big deal. Halloween was the gateway to the Holiday Season. Beyond that lay the post holidays descent into the revolting slush and bitter cold and the accompanying depression. Life began at Halloween and ended December 26th.

I’m from the last generation of people who went trick or treating in the glory days of shelling out – the 1970’s. There were no school shootings, no peanut allergies or gluten intolerances, no kid obesity epidemic. There weren’t many modern sensitivities at all. Costumes I remember making were pirate, hobo (just a jolly cartoon character who chooses to carry a stick with a bandana tied to it, jumpin’ trains and cookin’ hobo beans over a campfire), Indian chief and the devil, many things that would be considered insensitive today. There was no “global warming”, so it was a good ten degrees colder, and we often had the indignity of having to wear parkas over our costumes.

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from H & M

not for american children, of course.

1. Plant phony birth announcement in Honolulu paper.

2. Schedule World Cup 53 years in future.

3. Lay seeds of adultery in Senate candidate opponent in race 30 years hence.

4. Tout unknown lamebrain as Wasilla mayor.

5. Secret mind control on Heritage Foundation to suggest and Massachusetts to adopt universal health care.

So devious. It’s like The Omen was a blueprint.

This Obama fella sure is cunning for a guy who knows nothing about running a country….and for such a lazy lout, he sure does lots of insidious wheeling and dealing.