The Whore on Christmas

by kara on December 22, 2014

“Amidst the fragility of this politically correct era, it is imperative that we stand up for our beliefs before the element of faith in a glorious and traditional holiday like Christmas is marginalized and ignored,” Palin said in a statement released through her publisher. “This will be a fun, festive, thought provoking book, which will encourage all to see what is possible when we unite in defense of our faith and ignore the politically correct Scrooges who would rather take Christ out of Christmas.”

That nonsense is straight from Sarah Palin’s 2013 Christmas book, “GOOD TIDINGS AND GREAT JOY”; Protecting the Heart of Christmas It was in the bargain bin at Barnes and Noble tonight and no, I didn’t buy it, but I did take a copy with me to the children’s reading corner (I had on a rain hoodie pulled tight around my chin), and furiously scribble down some choice passages. Sarah Palin managed to take topic that has been so over done, so is so tired and be-troped,.and make it even stupider, in a grfity, a maniacal effort to appeal to the panic-stricken, self-pitying element of stupid white people upset about the blah President. According to the Griftess, this book is not an “in-your-face political lecture,” but there is a War on Christmas – a campaign to un-sanctify the second-most important holiday in the Christian religion – and of course the Reason for the Season is making moneys.

The book blathers on about the “scrooges” who are trying to keep explicitly Christian language from having pride of place in civic life in this country. Mooselini also shares “personal memories and traditions from her own Christmases and illustrate the reasons why the celebration of Jesus Christ’s nativity is the centerpiece of her faith.” She argle bargles on about how we should all keep Christ in Christmas, even if we aren’t necessarily Christians.

“What we believe in is freedom of expressing our faith and what our beliefs are, not allowing just a few angry atheists with attorneys perhaps to tell us that we can’t celebrate the birth of Christ the way that we would like to. And it’s not an in-your-face political lecture, it’s a fun book that incorporates the solution to the challenge that is a war on Christmas that we see taking place right now. […]we have recipes in there, and we have just a lot of fun things that hopefully will spark some inspiration in other people to allow them, no matter what faith anyone is, but allow them some Christmas joy to spread…”

Go, Sarah!! Everybody knows that Christmas is a totally real, not-made-up-by-Hallmark holiday. Jesus was born on December 25th, Year Zero, and there were pine trees and holly and eggnog and snow in the Middle East, for some reason, while blonde-haired, blue-eyed, English-speaking shepherds carried AR-15s. And Santa blessed everything and lo, it became fact.

“WISH ME A MERRY CHRISTMAS” she shrieks, but such proscription, rather than normal people’s well-meaning attempts to include everyone in a happy, celebratory time of year, seems deeply antithetical to what we’re constantly reminded is the “Christmas spirit.”Leave it to modern conservatives to take any remaining joy out of Christmas by ordering us what to think and say about it. What do you say when you don’t want her to have a merry Christmas or happy holidays? Personally, I want Sarah Palin to have the kind of Christmas Mr. Scrooge has: An abjectly horrifying experience which will change her attitude towards other people in a profound and permanent way. Is there a greeting for that?

 

 

Party like it’s 1964

by kara on December 17, 2014

I was so fucking happy this morning, I smiled all the way to work. Y que Viva Cuba!!!! Great day to be an anti embargo Cuban American. Negotiations have been going on since the spring of 2013, that sneaky Bamz, and were backed by the NuPope, which hosted meetings to finalize the agreements. Now we are gonna see The Best Obama, changing the world with the pen, hohoho. Chapeau le President de la Republique! Alas, now, the balance will switch to money, and labor markets, and minimum wages, and pollution. BTW, they have one of the cleanest environments, so let’s go see it now, before it’s gone. Once the Cuban car owners realize the true value of their 1950’s automobiles, they will be able to switch to all electric Tesla’s, so maybe the environment won’t be totally destroyed. Unless, of course, big oil decides they need a new oil refinery. Oh and let’s all go and see it before Christian missionaries descend on the place and fuck it up.

by kara on December 17, 2014

In honor of Stephen Colbert’s last show, let’s relive this wondrous moment in time:

 

Ye Old

by kara on December 14, 2014

Christmas tree at my grandparent’s house, Philadelphia, PA

 

Christmas tree in my childhood home, Wyndmoor, PA

At the White House War on Christmas party, American hero Michele Bachmann cornered President Obama so she could give him some final advice about how to be Commander in Chief, since obviously he’s been at a loss and waiting for her to give him a hand. This is literally what went down:

“I turned to the president and I said, something to the effect of, ‘Mr. President, you need to bomb the Iranian nuclear facilities, because if you don’t, Iran will have a nuclear weapon on your watch and the course of world history will change,’” she told the Washington Free Beacon.”

“And he got his condescending smile on his face and laughed at me and said, ‘Well Michele, it’s just not that easy.’ And I said to him, ‘No, Mr. President, you’re the president, it will happen on your watch, and you’ll have to answer to the world for this.’ And that was it and then I left. Merry Christmas,” she said with a laugh.

(photo: The Secret Service allowed another fucking nut to wander the White House?!!! GOT DAMN, it’s time for some heads to roll over those security breaches)

I got a sawbuck says this conversation only happened in the empty receptacle that passes for Bachmann’s skull.

 

by kara on December 12, 2014

Want to know if it was or was not torture? There’s a real simple way to find out.

Line these fuckers up and subject them to each and every “enhanced interrogation technique”,preferably after you woke them from a dead sleep and dragged them from their bedrooms in front of their families. I assure you, after about 90 seconds, there will be no doubt.

by kara on December 12, 2014

The one true Santa Claus, Wanamakers Philadelphia

by kara on November 28, 2014

by kara on November 28, 2014

Take a moment to remember where you were and what you were doing today because today, this Black Friday 2014, is likely the last time is the year the Brits have joined the Americans in partaking of the sacred pre-Christmas tradition of lining up outside big box stores to kill each other over $5 DVD players.

The Black Friday madness has spread to the U.K., where shoppers in London were spotted attacking each other earlier today over discounted television sets at an Asda superstore. Asda is a subsidiary of WalMart.

Shoppers wrestle over a television as they compete to purchase retail items on “Black Friday” at an Asda superstore in Wembley, north London.

My favorite story: A group of women brawled over underwear and lingerie at a U.K. Victoria’s Secret, according to this YouTube video:

http://youtu.be/8PpJMjGYIUw

CHEERS!