{"id":32249,"date":"2015-11-23T11:18:16","date_gmt":"2015-11-23T19:18:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/?p=32249"},"modified":"2015-11-23T11:18:16","modified_gmt":"2015-11-23T19:18:16","slug":"32249","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/?p=32249","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"<p>So, I was fed up with being burgled every other day by the burglars in my neighbourhood. So, I tore out my alarm system, put my pitbull to sleep and resigned from our local Neighbourhood Watch. I&#8217;ve planted a Iraqi flag in each corner of my front garden with a bog honking ISIS flag in the center. Now, the LAPD, CIA, the FBI, the National Security Bureau, Scotland Yard, MI-5, MI-6, and every other intelligence service in the world are all watching my house 24x7x365. My dog has a personal escort on her walks boyfriend, every time he leaves the house, has an escort. I&#8217;m followed to and from work every day. So no one bothers us at all these days. I have never felt safer in my life!<\/p>\n<!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on the_content --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on the_content -->","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>So, I was fed up with being burgled every other day by the burglars in my neighbourhood. So, I tore out my alarm system, put my pitbull to sleep and resigned from our local Neighbourhood Watch. I&#8217;ve planted a Iraqi flag in each corner of my front garden with a bog honking ISIS flag in [&hellip;]<!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-32249","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32249","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=32249"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32249\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32250,"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32249\/revisions\/32250"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=32249"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=32249"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/teensleuth.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=32249"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}